On the 1st March 2017 our family expanded, we were introduced to my son Lethabo Thabang-Jr Hlapo. His name means “Joy” or Happiness. The name came though the theme of our family’s names which is “Joy & Happiness”. My husband’s name is Thabang which means “Be happy”. Mine is Ncumisa and it means “Make them smile” and my daughter Rethabile’s name means “We are happy”. This is what we strive to achieve as a family. I also decided to squeeze in my husband’s name as our son’s second name. While I will encourage my son to be his own person and carve his own path in life, I wanted to honor my husband and also say to my son;
“You are born to a great man. You have in you the DNA of someone that has risen against many odds in life and has never lost love and compassion. Carry that with you and let it strengthen you when the road gets tough and as a reminder that in your veins runs the blood of a warrior and that means you are more than capable of creating out of your life what you want”
The first two months with my son were not easy for me. I suffered PND (Postnatal Depression), still do, but I am much better now after talking about it and getting a lot of support from my husband, mom and sisters and also seeking help. My company has a great platform to help employees seek advice and counselling on issues that they may be struggling with in their personal space, I utilised this avenue and they were able to explain a lot to me and also pointed me in the right direction. It did not help that I was doing a 12 week short course at UCT through their online platform, “Get Smarter”. While my tutor, course co-ordinator and the rest of the support team at Get Smarter were very supportive and understanding, I still felt I should have chosen a better time to enrol for the course. But I am happy that I was able to complete the course and now User Experience Certification is in the bag, yaaay!
My son cried a lot as he was adjusting to this big strange world. He only kept quiet when he was in mommy or daddy’s arms. As cute and reassuring as that is, I was tired and needed the nanny to help when daddy was not home but my little one was not having it. This came as a surprise to us because my nanny is good guys. I often say she was a gift straight from heaven. My daughter clicked with her from day one. But then one day my son was quiet and he became thee most quiet baby in the world. He is such a sweetheart. At seven months he is already sleeping right through the night. We introduced him to solids at 3 months, cereals. At 6 months we started with vegetables and he is loving all of it.
Having both a son and a daughter has been pretty awesome, it means I am not curious about what it’s like to have either. My son immediately claimed his space in the family and we were all too happy to share that space with him. Well except for my daughter, initially she struggled with the idea of this person that has claimed her Mama, Papa and nanny. She became more demanding of all of our attention. I even noticed that as soon as I put the baby down she would jump on to my arms and refuse to be separated from me. I am happy to say though that now, 7 months later, she has fully assumed the big sister role, yaaaay. She plays games (Peek-a-boo being his favorite) with him and enjoys seeing him laugh. If he cries she is the first to jump to his corner to sing ‘Johnny Johnny’ in an attempt to comfort him. It is such a joy that words cannot explain to see them enjoying each other’s presence. It has helped me a lot with dealing with the ‘mom guilt’ cause I did feel bad for introducing another baby before she was even out of diapers. I enjoy seeing her express love and compassion towards her brother and him appreciating her efforts.
I am slowly but surely getting back into my routine again. I am excited about the next steps in his and our journey.
Please do share your own stories with me via the comment section, email or social media.
Till next time…
Mommying in the city!